In Need OF...

So, the past 3.5 months have been crazy for me. My days are usually 18 hours long. I sleep for only 6 hours. A big downgrade from the 9 hour a day nights. My body is pretty beat up, although not in an anorexic way. I know I am gonna get wrinkle pretty early in life because of stress. I am in desperate need of the following:

- manicure/pedicure (I want black nail polish. They're pretty cool.)
- massage (at least an hour massage)
- a full day of sleep or just lying in bed (Oh that would be bliss!)
- a trip with Sterling (getaway..We need a getaway!)
- an eyebrow threading (They are getting bushy.)
- work pants and winter clothes (My clothes are all too big on me now! I am getting skinny. YAY! But not in a healthy way though. Hmmm...)
- a hockey game
- a win in a poker tourney (HEHE! To boost up my confidence)

Just want to de-stress..somehow by writing on my blog.

Happy Birthday to my great friend Gladys. Oh how I miss her!!!

And my friend Sabeth is getting married next April. I am definitely going to San Francisco! Can't wait!

Baby Step

This past weekend has been one of the greatest weekends of my life! Rem made voluntary, albeit small, movements with his left foot. Oh oh it made my hell of a week. I was sooo happy. Still am.

On top of that, he was able to get out of the rehab centre, get on the cab and go to Grandpa's 85th birthday party. He got dizzy on the cab ride because he's not "used to sitting at the back. I'm used to driving." But at least, he still had the chance to go out.

And now, he knows how to use the computer, brush his teeth and feed himself. Of course, we are still hoping for more, i.e. standing, walking, using his fingers. It will take time. But so far so good. His improvement has been amazingly quick. 3 months and counting.

So, that's the awesome weekend that we had here. Hopefully, there's more great surprising days to come!

GF Strong

After almost three months, Rem has been moved to GF Strong Rehabilitation Centre. As much as it looks depressing (all the people wheeling around in their wheelchairs), Rem seems to be enjoying it more. Livelier atmosphere, less depressing for him. He has more people to interact with, talking about how they got injured, what injury they have and what recovery they want to achieve. These things are very encouraging for Rem. He likes his nurses and therapists there as well - better service, he says.

For the first time in weeks, I feel relieved with his condition. He is continuously improving - legs becoming more sensitive, back muscles getting stronger. Although it is a long long way to go, I am happy with the way things are going now. I have accepted his situation, but there's still a lot of hope and faith inside me, that things will be okay.

Can't sleep...

Mom is leaving tomorrow. It feels like one of my legs will be amputated soon (in 24 hours!). Dad's here, but the amount of care he can give Rem will never compare to Mom's. This translates to more responsibilities for me. Not that I'm complaining.

Stress just gets to me lately. Deteriorating health (I lost at least 10 lbs), slacking off school (Haven't opened my book in 2 weeks), spending less and less time with Sterling. But I cannot give up, because I have to be with Rem all the time. I just feel the need to. I guess I am scared of him falling into frustration, into loneliness, into depression. This is the time for me to prove myself as an older sister, willing to take care of my shoti. I just wish I have more help. That's all...